I don’t know how.
I just know it’s our JOB.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
To forever be in pursuit of BECOMING our best.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Not selfishly.
Not for ourselves.
But to honor our creator, our mission, and our families.
I’ve always loved Star Trek.
I’ve always been inspired by the loyalty the characters had for one another.
I loved the mission and commitment of the characters.
I loved how the android Data is forever in pursuit of becoming more human.
He knew it would always remain out of reach, but he sought it incessantly.
It’s a goal worth striving for:
TO BE OUR BEST.
I don’t think we’ll ever get it perfect.
But we can try.
As best I can figure, on this Father’s day 2017…
Here are three RULES we dads should live by:
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
NUMBER ONE: LOVE comes FIRST.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Years ago, before I was a dad, my dog Isis was killed by a car.
She was the BEST dog in the world.
Worse, her death was “my” fault.
I knew it might happen.
I knew she was oblivious to traffic.
But I did NOTHING about it.
I’d known for years it could happen.
I even added it to my yearly goals’ list to teach her about traffic.
But I did NOTHING about it.
It sickens me to think of how lazy and selfish I was.
Especially because Isis was ABSOLUTELY my best friend.
It’s hard to describe how excellent this dog was.
She went everywhere with me.
She taught me about unconditional love.
And then, right in front of my house, she died.
I could have taken her to a class.
I could have put up a fence.
For about $200, I could have plugged in one of those electronic invisible fences.
But I didn’t.
And she died.
I know we’ve all lost loved ones.
I know worse things have happened to other people.
But I lost it.
Grief and guilt nearly paralyzed me.
Eventually, what saved me was to change the “meaning” of the event, her death, and my loss.
I chose to shift the meaning of her death into my dog’s last gift of unconditional love to me.
I chose to believe that she chose to give her life…to teach me a lesson.
To put love FIRST.
Not when it was convenient.
Not as an afterthought.
Not as a goal.
But first.
I took it a step further and decided that Isis’s ultimate sacrifice would one day save my children’s lives.
I knew I’d be a dad someday.
And I knew that because of this lesson, I’d one day make a choice.
A choice that would save my kid’s life.
Today, my daughter is ten years old.
I’d like to think the lesson I learned from Isis has saved my daughter’s life 1,000 times.
Isis is my guardian angel of love.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
NUMBER TWO: Love UNCONDITIONALLY.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
To love without judgment.
No matter what.
The ancient Greeks defined four variations of love.
Of the four, the term “agape” most closely equates to unconditional love.
Agape love is a choice.
It is a decision made to love regardless of circumstances or disappointments.
*Thus, unconditional love means loving another in their essence, as they are, no matter what they do or fail to do.
People with children usually seem to understand this notion best of all.
To believe in unconditional love, and to actually love unconditionally, requires a great deal of thought, action, and faith.
Only YOU can decide if and how you can (or should) love unconditionally.
To “feel” unconditionally loved is one of the warmest and most fulfilling and confidence-building sensations a person can experience.
My daughter, and future kids, and wife, and friends and family need not EARN my love.
My job is to love them.
Period.
My job is to let them know that my love is as “certain” and “absolute” as gravity.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
NUMBER THREE: Stop fucking LYING.
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Sounds simple.
To be a man of integrity.
But, this is tricky.
Most people “think” they have integrity.
But actually, I think most of us fall short.
If you’re a father…
If you’ll one day be a father…
If you are a man…
Then I think the following advice will be transformational to you.
Below is a Facebook post that was written by Garrett J White, founder of Wake Up Warrior, in 2014.
His rant is between the dashes:
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
WAKE UP WARRIORS…
(Daily Rant) – #WARRIORSWAY
STOP FUCKING LYING… TO YOURSELF.
Stop Lying about your Addictions.
Stop Lying about your Rage.
Stop Lying about your Hate.
Stop Lying about your Fear.
Stop Lying about your Desires.
Stop Lying about your Excitements.
Stop Lying about your Secrets.
Stop Lying about your LIFE.
Stop Lying about your Reality.
STOP FUCKING LYING… TO YOURSELF.
Until you are willing, to be honest about where you are and what you are feeling NOW, you will NEVER have what you truly want TOMORROW.
Consider that the reason YOU LIE to yourself and hence the world is because you…
…YOU HATE YOURSELF.
Why else would you Lie about what you Think, Feel and Experience?
To feel embarrassed or shameful about any aspect of yourself is to HATE SOME ASPECT OF YOU…
You See, Warrior, the Formula is simple.
HATING YOURSELF = LYING TO YOURSELF
LYING TO YOURSELF = LYING TO OTHERS
LYING TO OTHERS = A FEARFUL, SCARY LIFE BUILT ON A FOUNDATION OF LIES.
===> So the solution is simple.
Stop Hating Yourself Today <======
* How you might ask?
STOP FUCKING LYING… TO YOURSELF.
and start telling the #TRUTH at least to YOU in private; this is a good step in the right direction.
============
HERE IS WHAT YOU DO
============
Take a journal a notepad or a camera and start by answering the following two questions…
WHAT IS THE GREATEST LIE I AM TELLING MYSELF TODAY?
Then follow it with:
WHAT AM I MOST AFRAID THAT OTHERS WILL FIND OUT ABOUT ME?
If you will answer these two questions honestly on paper and then speak them into a camera, you will Immediately begin to feel better.
WHY?
Because step one in LOVING YOURSELF is being HONEST with yourself.
Today, you have one shot to reclaim your power, and it begins with the simple process of telling the truth to you.
STOP FUCKING LYING… TO YOURSELF.
Love and Light,
Garrett J White – The Master Coach Mentor
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
In summary:
It’s our JOB to seek to become the GREATEST dads we can be.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Three RULES to live by:
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
NUMBER ONE: LOVE comes FIRST.
NUMBER TWO: Love UNCONDITIONALLY.
NUMBER THREE: Stop fucking LYING.
This morning I asked my daughter what she thought my job was.
She said it’s just one thing:
“To play with me.”
I wish all the dads out there a Happy Father’s Day.
I’m gonna go play with my daughter.
To check out books by Trevor Crane, visit:
https://www.trevorcrane.com/books/
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